Sunday, March 23, 2008

Bush Will Sell Naming Rights To Iraq War

President Bush commemorated the 5th anniversary of the Iraq War, by winning the Only Person Who Still Thinks The Iraq War Was A Good Idea award. He shared the award with Dick Cheney and John McCain.

McCain visited Iraq, and said that although things were going very well now, one hundred years from now, our troops in Iraq will be doing even better. McCain said that Iran should stop helping Al Qaeda in Iraq, and then after Joe Lieberman whispered in his ear, McCain corrected himself and said what he meant to say was that he and Lieberman were war mongers.

With the US economy in recession, how will Bush continue to fund his war if Congress finally gets some backbone and cuts funding for the war?

The same way greedy owners of sports teams constantly raise ticket prices in direct proportion to how badly their team plays. And sell the naming rights to stadiums and arenas, that were originally named after people who actually accomplished something worthwhile in their life. William Shea, who helped bring the Mets to New York, had his name posthumously dropped from their new stadium in favor of Citigroup, which may well follow the lead of another failed company Enron, and go out of business during the first season in 2009.

Bush could sell the naming rights to the Iraq War to a bevy of suitors. What corrupt, immoral company wouldn't want to have their name associated with an illegal war fraudulently presented to an American public that doesn't pay attention to it anymore?

Halliburton would be the obvious choice since they've already benefited so much from the war, by screwing up everything they got their hands on-which pretty much sums up what the Bush Administration has done. But Blackwater could make a strong case too, because in a war where tens of thousands of innocent civilians have been killed, nobody kills them better than Blackwater.

Of course the mainstream media played a big part in spreading the fear and the lies of the Bush administration to a largely unquestioning American public and Congress. So how about Fox News presents The Iraq War? CNN would want to stay competitive with Fox, so maybe they could be co-sponsors of the war. Just think of the noisy graphics they could come up with for that.

In the end though, we have to give credit where credit is due. Sell the naming rights to all the elected officials, like John McCain and Hillary Clinton, who voted for the war, and have never apologized for doing so. And to the millions of Americans who can recite every detail about Dancing With The Stars and American Idol, but don't have the slightest idea what's going on in Iraq.

But we can only pick one person to have his name inextricably linked to this crime against humanity. So on the fifth anniversary of the Iraq War, let's rename it for the guy who started it all.

Bush's War.

1 comment:

Allora said...

'Bush's War' fits swimmingly