Sunday, October 7, 2007

Doubting Thomases and Other Doubts

Clarence Thomas is a man who admirably lifted himself out of extreme poverty to serve in high level Justice Department positions, but his biggest distinction is being one of the most unqualified people to ever serve on the Supreme Court. In the 16 years he’s been on the bench, the only words he’s ever uttered is, “I go along with whatever Scalia just said.” Yet even though his nomination was confirmed, in his new memoir, he’s still pissed off. Especially at liberals, who he said treated him worse that the Ku Klux Klan ever did. So a man who thinks that Ted Kennedy is worse than the Grand Wizard is deliberating on issues affecting our life and liberty.

There were two Thomases to doubt the past week. Isiah Thomas, the coach and general manager of the Knicks, was found by a jury to have sexually harassed a woman executive at Madison Square Garden. And his defense was that it’s OK for a black man to call a black woman a “bitch”. If Clarence Thomas was the presiding judge he would have probably sided with Isiah Thomas, because that’s essentially what Clarence called Anita Hill. What's next from the boorish, arrogant misogynistic management of the Knicks and Madison Square Garden? Are they going to change the name of the Knicks City Dancers to the Knicks City Bitches? And name Don Imus as their new play by play announcer?

I was at a party last week where inexplicably a boxing match on HBO was on television. In the justifiable uproar over Michael Vick and dog fighting, don’t you think someone should make a peep about humans beating each other’s brains out, with celebrities happily watching ringside? Take away the gloves and the Everlast shorts and what you have is two men or women having the kind of fight someone would try to break up in real life. Maybe it’s time to break up the fight in the ring as well. I hate it when people say that boxing is a ticket out of “the streets”. So is the military, and the end result is essentially the same. You get short term financial stability, so you can injure or kill someone, and quite possibly get injured or killed yourself. And as I watched the fight out of the corner of my eye, I couldn’t help but notice that the HBO announcers wore tuxes. When two guys are pounding each other into submission, is formalwear really called for?

I’m glad Senator Larry Craig said this week that he won’t resign. Why should he? If they were going to make Senators resign for “moral turpitude”, he should have been forced to resign with other Senators like him who voted against according gays equal rights and protections under the law. That’s immoral. Tapping your feet in a men’s room stall isn’t immoral, it’s annoying. And even having sex in a stall shouldn't be a crime- it’s just rude. After all, people are waiting who have to actually use the bathroom. It would be great if we lived in a society that didn’t feel the need to have undercover police sitting in men’s room stalls all day waiting for men to tap their feet.

Republicans are afraid it ruins their family values image. Is it really pro-family to send sons off to war for no reason and keep them there indefinitely? And is it pro-family to threaten Iran, by saying we might use our military options, instead of negotiating? Military options is a polite way of saying “Killing men, women and children.” We should make Presidential candidates say those words instead of "military options". Rudolph Giuliani would have to say "We can’t take the killing of men, women and children option off the table.”

New Yorkers seem more devastated by the collapse of the Mets than by the collapse of our moral authority. Wouldn’t it be a wonderful world, if people got more outraged by a President who misled us into a horribly unnecessary war, than by a decent and talented Mets manager who couldn’t get his wildly overpaid players to hit, field or pitch a ball? Instead of “Fire Willie”, I’d like to live in a country where 55,000 people in a stadium yelled “Fire Bush and Cheney” instead.